DBacks beat 'Cocks 7-1
Posted August 01, 2014
Phrasing. Lots at stake in this game. With a W, the DBacks would face the Cards in the first round of the playoffs, and with a loss, the Wolfpack. An early lightning storm over the Rocky Mountains makes the @FMBAUmprires call everyone off the field in top of two. Basically no one left the ...
DBacks down DustDevils again 23-9
Posted July 31, 2014
You might say this is the prototypical FMBA game, as two veteran knuckleballers squared off in a battle of wrench-throwing. Veteran Tony Wyllie was on the bump for the DBacks. He was throwing so well that DBacks management elected to "quit while ahead" and put rookie pitcher Adam Bader in. ...
DBacks dust Dust Devils 14-8
Posted July 30, 2014
Game 8 of the DBacks 10 game road stand went down as you might expect. Management received news prior to the game that slugging 1B Brent Cooper was out for the season with a broken foot from fouling a ball off himself earlier in the week. What a ****. In the first inning, Band-Aid Trask pulls ...
DBacks edge 'Cocks
Posted July 29, 2014
Prior to the game, the Gamecocks held a press release for their new official Twitter account. Welcome to the beak-fest, fellas. This was another typical close Dbacks/Gamecocks matchup. But instead of stellar defence keeping the game close, it was sub-par defense on both sides that lead to the t...
DBacks crush Cards 8-1
Posted July 29, 2014
In the midst of a 14-game home/road trip, the Dbacks looked to lay the smack down on arch-most-hated-team-rival the Cardinals. Known for their fine taste in classy women, the DBacks once again did not disappoint on this day. The fans were so impressive, in fact, that league MVPierre started the...
DBacks blown away by Giants 11-8
Posted July 25, 2014
With right field wind gusts estimated at 156 km/h everyone knew this day would suck. Making it suck a little less was a guest appearance from Kenneth Nichols III aka Junior aka JR. He was promised to catch Saunders but the big fella caught a bad case of vaginaitis and prompted DBacks management t...
DBacks dust Dukes 4-1
Posted July 23, 2014
This was opposite day, as Gayef supplied the bulk of the offence by reaching for pitches in the other batters box with his gorilla arms and swatting them into the opposite field while Trask mowed down the Dukes with a steady diet of 70mph fastballs down the middle. Trask was so unhittable at one...
Dbacks squeak by Giants
Posted July 23, 2014
Gayef, 'nuff said. MVP: Gayef for throwing a 4 hitter gem. Vag Badge: Gayef for showing everyone in the ball park what the "Gayef Rage" is. ...
DBacks donate two to the Gunz
Posted July 08, 2014
Stampede, 'nuff said. MVP: None Vag Badges: DBacks defence x 2 ...
Kelowna
Posted July 05, 2014
This entire weekend was a blur, but here's what was remembered: GAME 1 VS KELOWNA JAYS The non-FMBA strike zone was not a good omen for the wily vet Tony Wyllie. Combined with some god-awful defence only the Diamondbacks could produce, we lost this one 10-4. Vag Badge: Shippit/Cooper/Suthe...