# | Name | POS | H | W | DOB | School | GRAD | Hometown |
Ethan Clements | Mascot | 2'2"2 | doodie | Apr 15/49 | Kindergarten for Clowns | -4 | Popcorn | |
4 | Josh Cohen | Injured | 10'11 | 987654321 | Dec 31/57 | Pre-K | Pre- | Poopee |
9 | Kurt Clements | QB/LB | 5'0" | 91 | Oct 28/93 | Canyon Lake Middle | 6 | Dutoilert |
# | Name | POS | Hometown |
Mike Geach | Head Coach | Dead Rabbit Pass |