Stars 6 Pirates 4

A letter poured in to the SGR mailbag this week. It reads: “Dear SGR, When I was growing up I wasn’t allowed to stay up late enough and watch the ‘Tonight Show with Johnny Carson.’ Can you tell me one of your favorite jokes from that show?” Signed, Humorless N. Richmond.

Well Mr. Richmond, that really has nothing to do with the Stars or baseball, but the SGR was a big Tonite Show fan back in the day, and it is the dog days of August, and hits and humor are getting hard to come by, so we’ll play along. One of our favorite jokes was from Johnny’s Carnac the Magnificent bit where Carnac could discern the answer to a question that was in a sealed envelope, whereupon he would then open the envelope revealing the question. Our favorite went like this:

Ed: “Here is the first question” handing the envelope to Carnac.

Carnac: “Sis, boom, bah.”

Ed: “Sis, boom, bah.”

Carnac the Magnificent: (Reading the question from the card in the envelope) “Describe the sound made when a sheep explodes.”

Thanks again for your letter. Anyone else with any funny ideas to help drag the SGR to the end of the season please address them to the SGR Mailbag, under the mat behind the Landing.

There were some explosive hits, but no animals were hurt when the Stars and Pirates completed their regular season series at George Pinter field on Saturday in a game that had big implications on the regular season standings with both teams entering the contest with identical 14-2 records. When the dust settled the Stars ended up on top of a well played game by a score of 6 to 4 to take three of the four meetings with the Pirates this year and move one game ahead in the standings with one week left in the 2017 season.

Big Lefty took the hill for the Stars in his second appearance of the season. Looking no worse for wear after last weeks outing, Big Lefty threw two scoreless innings. OConn provided some help in the first fielding a gounder at third with one out and the bases loaded and deftly stepping on third before throwing a strike to IKat at home to get the runner out at the plate. Yes, I wrote that: “OConn threw a strike to home.”

OConn led the way in the bottom of the first as well starting things off with a leadoff single and eventually coming around to score. Stars scored another run on a bases loaded walk to take a 2-0 lead into the second inning.

ARob came in to pitch in the third. An error, single and double led to two Pirate runs in the third, after which ARob kept the Pirates stickys at bay allowing just one hit and one walk over the next two innings.

The Stars broke the tie in the bottom of the Fifth. RR hit the proverbial crap out of a ball to deep left field that scored Big Lefty who had reached earlier when the fielders chose to get ARob out in a run down. Hawk followed that with a single that scored Big Lar who had reached on an HBP.

Pirates threatened in the sixth. RR showed some rust hitting two batters before a single scored a run to cut the lead to one. Stars stickys came alive again in the seventh. With two outs Hardcore and ARob both got on with basehits. Big Lefty then clobbered a ball over the right fielders head to drive in two runs. Pirates got back a run in the eighth taking advantage of an error and a single.

With the Stars leading 6 to 4 in the top of the ninth, RR took the hill. With the bases loaded and two outs the Pirate batter hit a ground ball up the middle that looked like it would squeeze through and likely allow two runners to score and tie the game. But then, seemingly out of nowhere, NewHawk laid out from his position at short, somehow managing to snag the ground ball before it got out of the infield, then had the presence of mind to toss the ball to Tup covering at second for the force out, extinguishing the Pirate uprising, and preserving the victory for the Stars.

Post Script: As of this posting date the Stars final game of the season has been forfeited by the Royals effectively meaning that the STARS WIN THE PENNANT! Stars will finish the 2017 with a record 16 wins and just 2 losses. Stars have now won 7 regular season titles in 14 seasons.

Game Saturday at Queens Park at noon will be an exhibition game. Keep your eyes posted on teamsnap for upcoming practice times as prep for the playoff begins. Stars get bye to semi-final on September 16 at George Pinter Field.

Carnac: "The Stars."

Ed: "The Stars"

Carnac: (To Ed)"May a bird of paradise fly down your pants."

Carnac: (Reading the question from the card in the envelope) "Who are the 2017 Regular Season Champs?"

George: "Sweet!"

GO STARS!!!