A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his patients to a
baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to
to his commands. When the day of the game arrived, everything went
quite well. As the National Anthem started, the doctor yelled "Up
Nuts," and the patients complied by standing up. After the anthem, he
yelled, "Down Nuts," and they all sat back down in their seats.
After a home run was hit, the doctor yelled, "Cheer Nuts". They all
broke out into applause and cheered. When the umpire made a
particularly bad call against the star of the home team, the Doctor
yelled, "Booooo Nuts," and they all started booing and cat calling.
Comfortable with their response, the doctor decided to go get a beer
and a hot dog, leaving his assistant in charge. When he returned,
there was a riot in progress.
Finding his tizzied assistant, the doctor asked, "What in the world
He replied, "Well everything was going just fine until this guy walked
by and yelled, "PEANUTS!"
You might be a baseball nut if…
* You subscribe to Baseball Weekly during the off-season.
* You go to amateur ballgames (Little League, softball, etc.) even though you don’t know anyone on the teams.
* Many of your summertime meals seem to consist of $6 hotdogs, $5 nachos and $4 cokes.
* You’re still looking for that Todd van Poppel rookie card.
* The last time you flew across country you planned a stop in Chicago so you could go to Wrigley Field.
* You own a copy of the Official Baseball Rulebook. And you understand the Infield Fly and Balk rules.
* You’ve ever scored a game.
* You’re still carrying on a feud with your neighbor over whether Ichiro should have been eligible for Rookie of the Year.
* You know who pitched the seventh game of the ’68 World Series.
* You have Spring Training season tickets.
* Your spouse asks where you’d like to go on vacation this year and you say, "Boston, Baltimore, Cleveland and Detroit."
* You search out the Internet for web sites like this one.
* You design web sites like this one.